I would like to know who wrote or said the truism, “Old age is not for sissies.” Of course, we know the alternative, so we work to prevail. As I am an expert on aging and very practiced, I will give you some ideas of what to expect and how to cope. Everyone wants to live a long time, but no one wants to age. Possible? Yes.
One of the first aging things I noticed was that some muscles seemed floppy; I hate to say flabby, but they did seem to hang.
Also, I have lost my interest in laced-up shoes and avoid wearing them. At first I wondered why and then I realized I didn’t want to bend over.
I have developed a great affinity for banisters. I never paid them any attention in the past and didn’t care whether they were there or not. Now I look for their presence, their sturdiness and design. I have a preference for their size, not too wide and not too thin for a good grip. I have never discussed this with anyone and resent my dependency.
I have had the expected and required cataract surgery, and I can’t help but wonder if this will go out of style like the required tonsil removal of my youth. However, I do see well but still want to be near the speaker and sit close to the front everywhere I go. I assist my failing ears with lip reading.
All of a sudden it seemed I had forgotten how to put on a sweater or a coat. Either one arm is missing or there is an extra one with no sleeve. My solution is to always put in the weaker arm first and then the second sleeve is easier to find.
I now hang out with friends fifteen to twenty years younger than myself. When I was forty-five, a thirty-year-old was living in a different world and we had little in common and would not have become friends. Now, my younger friends and I have a lot in common and have fun together. This is a good thing, as you will lose your same-age friends as time passes. This doesn’t work with men as most like women much younger than themselves. I can understand, we are not as cute as we used to be. Good luck to them!
It seems to take me longer to get anything done. Maybe I am just slower getting started. But that is not such a big problem because I really have less to do.
Speaking of activities, find some! Activity and connection with others is truly the only answer to aging wisely. Pursue a longtime interest you didn’t have time for when working. I try to do something different every couple of months to give my brain something new to handle. I certainly never wrote a column before! Volunteering or joining an interest group or club is an easy way for some. If nothing else, help someone who is in worse condition than you are.
I have finally decided, putting my pride aside, that I appreciate someone offering a hand or an elbow. Might as well face the changes and enjoy the memories that will float up when least expected.
I am not a sissy, so old age and I are friends.
Jeanette Smith, 95, a Blythewood resident, has been active in the community’s civic affairs for over 50 years.